First, the title is a middle English word for female genitalia.  It’s Chaucer and his work plays a small part in this episode, but I think it sets the tone for the show.  It’s tantamount to finding a good foreign swear word and then titling your term paper with it because it sounds pretty.

I digress, much like the show.

See, I don’t know what to think any more about Dollhouse.  It can be intriguing and funny and then seconds later it can insult you completely with its lack of polish and horrible writing.  The more I watch, the more I’m beginning to root for Senator Perrin.  I really hope he finds these people and shuts the whole operation down.  There’s really no reason to have this level of depravity in existence.  It’s not even fun to ponder the possibilities because Joss Whedon isn’t going to show us what’s possible.  He’s going to show us puerility.

“Belle Chose” starts off interestingly enough.  A Crispen Glover like person has kidnapped four women and drugged them.  Then he poses them like mannequins and plays in a croquette scene where they are family members.  One of the women starts to come out of it and begins crawling away.  He injects her again but she stabs him back.  This sets him off and he uses a croquette mallet on her head.  That done, now he needs a replacement “aunt” which takes him outside where he’s hit by a car.

His brain damaged body is brought to the dollhouse because this man’s uncle is a client and financial contributor.  During a brain scan they find out he’s a psychopath so they dump his brain into Victor and ask him some questions.  His uncle (played by Michael “Saul Tigh” Hogan) says Paul Ballard is questioning him all wrong and eventually sneaks the psycho-in-Victor out of the Dollhouse.  Of course the psycho escapes and is roaming LA without a GPS chip.  (He had facial reconstruction and Doc Saunders took the chip out and never put it back in and now she’s gone too.)

Meanwhile, Echo is being sent to fulfill the fantasy of a college professor (Arye Gross.)  He apparently gives this girl an F on her paper about Chaucer but then allows her to come to his office and be “tutored.”  It’s fairly cliché and tawdry and kind of what you’d expect from any of the movies Dushku has starred in.  It felt really out of place for this show considering how hard they try to get people to watch and be loyal; this felt like a slap in the face.  Besides, what college professor could afford an active?  The best thing about Echo’s engagement was the wardrobe manager played by Matt Winston (son of famed SFX guru Stan Winston.)  His lines and delivery were a bit of charm and glisten to this otherwise tragic outing.

Anyway, Topher and Adelle are going to try a remote wipe of Victor.  They still have his bio signal so they’re going to try to piggy back off that and wipe the psycho right out of his hair.  They fail epically and not only does the attempt shut down the power of the Dollhouse, but it also switches Echo and Victor’s imprints.  So suddenly a misogynist killer is dancing with a college professor and a college harlot is picking up guys and dancing at a club.

The killer stabs the professor in the neck but Langton is close by enough to get help.  The college girl Victor gets into a fight but Paul is there to take her back in for a treatment.  Echo Killer goes back to where he’s holding the kidnapped women and begins harassing them again when Echo’s brain begins shorting out.  She says she almost can’t control it so they’ll have to kill her or the man will keep coming after them.  Luckily the Dollhouse Special Forces unit arrives before the croquette mallet falls.

Echo is wiped but as she looks at the vegged out killer, she uses his “Goodness gracious” catch phrase.

There were so many holes in this I needed some turkey and mustard to complete the sandwich.  I don’t know about you, but if I’m a hot co-ed dancing with a professor one minute and then next I’m at a club, I’m not going to start dancing.  Not to mention the fact that suddenly I’m wearing pants and not a skirt and my boobs have gone missing.  At least when the killer switched to Echo, he/she was able to look in a mirror and acknowledge that something was different.  But there’s no reaction to any of it.  The best we got was when he was dumped into Victor and there was a pause to consider that it was all a trick.  See, you spend a long time in your own body and if you suddenly awoke in another body, wouldn’t you freak out?  Just a little?

These people don’t and it’s beginning to hurt the show.

When the big bad of Dollhouse was Alpha, there was at least a little reality and a little danger.  Now that there’s no overriding plot, other than the ineffectual Ballard or the never seen Senator Perrin, there’s nothing stopping the depravity and chaos of this show.    The science is dodgy, the writing is painful and I’m sorry Eliza, but I haven’t seen any acting growth at all.  Don’t get me wrong, I like Topher in small doses.  I like Langton.  I like Whiskey a lot as she’s proved very dependable and effectual.  I like Ballard when he’s being a hardass and not a puppy dog following Caroline.  I just don’t have any feelings for Echo, at all.  I’m not rooting for her but I’m not hoping she fails.  I just don’t care, because she’s no one.

Summer Glau is poised to star in a few episodes, but to me it’s a case of throwing another pretty girl into the cast to see if they can get a few points in the ratings from all the spurned Terminator fans.  River was not the best part of Firefly and Cameron was not the best part of Terminator.

Dollhouse already has a few pretty girls, why not get some talented writers instead?  I bet they’d be cheaper.

Two out of five creepy doll heads.